![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
letters i'll never send
Jun. 27th, 2006 06:19 amin the tradition of a lovely, yet inscrutable, girl i once knew, i shall now pen a few letters i have no intention of sending. the irony here is that i don't write letters, nor do i ever send them. perhaps if i write enough unsent ones i'll actually work up to writing a real one to my grandmother.
* * *
dear Charlie,
thank you so much for your advice and understanding (now and always). i've been thinking about the things you said and you're right: another name will never feel quite right. i can't be dishonest with myself. not now. not after i have been so many times in the past. i'm trying to be true to myself, and choosing another name because of someone else, even if it is my mother, will set me back on the path of trying to be what other people want me to be instead of who i really am. i know that's not exactly what you said, but it was your words that pointed the way. i'm lucky to have such a patient and insightful friend.
love, Jack
* * *
dear queen of disks,
i'm sorry this is hard on you. i'm even sorrier that it's about to get a lot harder. i just hope that you love me enough to see how important this is to me. i didn't chose the name to upset you, and i'd pick another one if i could. but i can't. please try and understand that. please try and understand me.
love, your child
* * *
dear prince of wands,
wtf? no really. be straight with me here - what. the. fuck? quit screwing around with me unless you actually want to do just that. it's exhausting, frustrating, and headache inducing. that said, don't lie on top of me when you give me a hug, especially when i'm sitting indian style. it's indecent. and when i say so, and tell you to knock it off, that's not an invitation to be even more obnoxious about it. do it again and i'll either break your face or chew it off. no promises on which it will be. also, don't compare me with your girlfriend. just don't. i don't like her, and it makes my head explode. thanks.
sincerely, Jack
* * *
dear Charlie,
thank you so much for your advice and understanding (now and always). i've been thinking about the things you said and you're right: another name will never feel quite right. i can't be dishonest with myself. not now. not after i have been so many times in the past. i'm trying to be true to myself, and choosing another name because of someone else, even if it is my mother, will set me back on the path of trying to be what other people want me to be instead of who i really am. i know that's not exactly what you said, but it was your words that pointed the way. i'm lucky to have such a patient and insightful friend.
love, Jack
* * *
dear queen of disks,
i'm sorry this is hard on you. i'm even sorrier that it's about to get a lot harder. i just hope that you love me enough to see how important this is to me. i didn't chose the name to upset you, and i'd pick another one if i could. but i can't. please try and understand that. please try and understand me.
love, your child
* * *
dear prince of wands,
wtf? no really. be straight with me here - what. the. fuck? quit screwing around with me unless you actually want to do just that. it's exhausting, frustrating, and headache inducing. that said, don't lie on top of me when you give me a hug, especially when i'm sitting indian style. it's indecent. and when i say so, and tell you to knock it off, that's not an invitation to be even more obnoxious about it. do it again and i'll either break your face or chew it off. no promises on which it will be. also, don't compare me with your girlfriend. just don't. i don't like her, and it makes my head explode. thanks.
sincerely, Jack
