cock in a box

i did it. i bought myself a packer. i wasn't going to. i didn't think i had any interest in such an item when i first discovered they existed a couple months ago. it seemed pointless, bizarre, and even a bit perverse. but i kept thinking about it, revisiting the links every time someone would mention them online. last night i poured over the Babeland web site for a good two hours. i read through reviews, tips, and insights. i walked away feeling less ashamed and more informed.

i've always carried an abnormal amount of embarrassment when it comes to sex. (hell, i'm embarrassed writing this.) you'd think i was catholic. i'm not exactly sure where it comes from, my folks were always pretty open about such things. it's only recently that i can talk about such things without turning a brilliant crimson. i still have a hard time with it, but i think my recent attitude of self acceptance in regards to my gender identity has helped enormously.

at any rate, after looking over the site i started to think about why i *didn't* want to purchase said item. it boiled down to shame. and you know what? that's bullshit. i don't want fear, shame, or embarrassment to be at the wheel anymore. it's my turn to drive, and if i want to buy a cock then dammit i should. i decided to sleep on it and woke up this morning decided. it's only $20 after shipping, which seems too cheap not to try. so i did it. in 3-5 days i'll have my very own wee schlong (i got the smallest one). what will the mailman think? *laugh*